Wednesday Blues

Sunset

Today, I woke up early and greeted the sky before the sun displayed its magnificence. I was almost late for the seminar yesterday that I have to force myself to take the taxi for me to get there on time. So today, I woke up extra early and was actually the earliest to arrive there. It was 6:20 a.m. and I was already anxiously waiting for the commute. I mean it’s still early but most of the jeepneys are full. I couldn’t help but laugh with sarcasm. Everyone is too busy. Everyone keeps a pace to themselves. Isn’t overwhelming? Stress doesn’t end when you graduate from school. It doesn’t end unless you end it. I can’t see myself doing the same thing, just like what most of people are doing. And I know that I will be lying to myself if I’d give it another chance. 

I almost lost myself in this work-driven society. I almost let myself drown away with the wrong perception and biased thinking. I’m craving for something more. I crave for creativity, for freedom, for expression, for social service and for empowerment. I crave for the things I cannot find in my present situation. I kept on digging but it sometimes it gets so hard when you don’t give up one thing for something. I can’t be in two places at one time, and I have to choose. There are paths that may lead us to somewhere and will cost us something, but it will be worth it. 

I’ll be taking the first steps.
One step at a time.
And I will be there.



My mind is shouting with words I cannot search. I'm too lost at the moment that I let myself be guided with the breeze that has no direction. I let myself let go of every restraint, every negative thought but they keep on coming back. Haunting me all over again. But I have to start again, get up and play on.